When my resistance prevents me from seeing naked truths about myself—the uncomfortable deplorable ones—a beloved Biblical character comes to mind. A kinsman of mine with whom I share the distressing trait of wanting to see what I want to see, and disavow what doesn’t fit my perception of how life is to be.
Jesus’ disciple, Peter, was a rough ‘n tumble type, who often found himself in the Son of Man’s disfavor for his impetuous statements and actions. On no occasion was this more evident than when Jesus, shortly before his betrayal and incarceration, asked the disciples: Who do you say I am?
Peter, who had just finished leading them in a robust version of their favorite hymn, replied: The Messiah!
Peter, bless his human soul, like scores of others, wanted Jesus to storm Jerusalem and throw out the Romans, call down armed heavenly hosts to destroy the oppressors. When Jesus revealed what was actually going to occur—betrayal, arrest, mock trial, death sentence, crucifixion, and a resurrection—Peter would have none of it, especially when his Lord and Master informed him that today—yes, tonight—before the rooster crows twice you yourself will disown me three times.
Peter was incensed and replied: Even if all your followers fall away, I will not.
Only Peter, among the disciples, had the bluster and grandiosity to pull off what followed. He clenched his fists, raised them heavenward, and began to rebuke Jesus for his misguided thinking. Even if I have to die with you, he declared, I will never disown you!
Jesus, familiar with his beloved disciple’s rants and posturing said in a firm but loving tone: Get thee behind me Satan! Peter, sensing Jesus’ displeasure with his antics, put the kibosh on his boastful enthusiasm, but not before he drew a sword and struck the servant of the high priest, the one who’d come to arrest Jesus, cutting off his ear.
Jesus knew patience even as he was all too aware of what lay ahead. Peter, the willful and impulsive disciple, is the one about whom Jesus said: Thou art Peter [my beloved], and upon this rock I will build my church.
Jesus healed the servant’s ear, and later that night Peter denied his master three times. He’d been unable or refused to see himself through the mirror of Jesus’ words. As the pain and hurt of his actions became known to him, he felt the wretchedness of his choices; his deplorable-self, but he recovered and went on to fulfill Jesus’ promise about the church—he became the bishop of Rome and some claim the first pope. He found a way to see beyond the self-serving image, the one we all can too easily embrace as the whole truth.
“When you look at your face in the mirror, what do you see in it that you most like and what do you see in it that you most deplore?” –Frederick Buechner
by 
My mirror image shows a weathered face, that like time itself moves ahead, forever changing.
Tom,
Weathered but not menacing, forever changing but grounded. Thanks Tom for reading and commenting.
Roger
When I look at my face in the mirror every morning I see a face that once had several cases of frost bite, scars from various accidents and surgery, a lot of wrinkles and a beard that once was dark but now gray. However, I think I still look good for my age. Of course, others may disagree on this latter comment. One way or the other I will keep the face I have. I kind of like it.
Bud,
Jenny and I agree, you’re lookin’ good Bud. You and I know, as does she, that it is what’s behind the frost bite, accidents, surgeries, wrinkles and beard that creates the countenance you deservedly want to keep. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Roger
How good God was to provide me with the poor eyesight I now have, knowing I would be kinder to myself as I look into the mirror with wrinkles disguised and softened.
JoAnne,
Amazing the gifts we find. Poor eyesight enables a kinder soul. Maybe I won’t have my eyes checked!
Thanks for reading and responding,
Roger
Although I do not recall with such clarity the biblical stories and characters you bring to the fore, I can easily relate to and share Peter’s human condition of seeing what I want to see, and disavowing what I’d rather not face. In the end, we are all such flawed beings, as God has created and loves, despite our contradictions, weaknesses, and flaws. Learning to love and accept ourselves as we are, is our sacred task while living this miraculous and precious gift of life. I love the many mirrors we see everywhere on this journey, such as the sky so beautifully reflected in the puddle on the ground after a cleansing rainfall to remind us of the holy whole of all that is. Thank you for your writings to help prompt me to reflect and pray. Amen
Colette,
Your phrase “…remind us of the holy whole of all that is,” captures what it means if we’re present and receptive to both the sacred and secular that surround us–nicely written, and thank you.
Roger